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Boarding school was a nightmare as far as I was concerned. Thankfully, I was a day student all through my 6 years in secondary school. The thought of staying in a female hostel at the university was something I nursed with mixed feelings. Just like every phase of my life, I was going to learn a good number of life lessons from this experience.

In 2008, I gained admission into the University of Benin, Benin City. Being a teenager at the time, I was ecstatic at the thought of leaving home and going to school in another state. At school, I had the option of staying in the school hostels or private-owned hostels popularly known as “off campus”. My place of residence was a highly debated topic among my parents and siblings (I’m the last born). After much deliberation, it was settled that I would stay in the school hostel. It was going to be a tough one year because that’s how long I lasted there.

Life in Hall 2 (Tinubu Hall)

The University of Benin is owned by the federal government of Nigeria. As with all things run by the Nigerian government, the school hostels were not in the best conditions. The lack of maintenance culture was evident and this was the main reason why private-owned hostels thrived. This post will be unnecessarily lengthy if I go into details of what my hostel looked liked. Just bear in mind that the living conditions were unsanitary and uncomfortable.

The bed arrangement in the hostel was designed in favor of the year 3 and final year students. There were 4 bunk beds in each room meaning that 8 females shared one room. According to this arrangement, I was on the top bunk while my bunk mate aka bunky occupied the down bunk. My bunky was a year 3 Philosophy student and she had a squatter who shared the same bed space with her. Although, with the right connections, a fresher was able to get a final year student’s bed space.

In essence, I had 9 roommates but this number wasn’t constant- it was more or less on some days. I was used to having my own space and organizing it the way I wanted and this new reality didn’t sit well with me. Who was I to complain? I quickly adjusted.

Lessons Learned

Living with females is difficult- it’s a fact. In such a setting, the first rule was RESPECT. Respect yourself and then mind your business. This is a general rule in life. I was fortunate to have had the best roommates but some freshers like me had different stories to tell. Even though I had good roommates, we had bad days, disagreements and quarrels. Looking back, I picked up a few life lessons from my one year residency at Hall 2 and they are as follows;

• You are capable of making adjustments– Don’t be afraid to explore and try out new things. Who would have thought that I would have been able to stay in such a clustered space? I had to find out ways to make things work for me and I developed a routine which I stuck with.
• Greetings won’t kill you– A simple ‘Hi’ or ‘Good morning’ won’t take a drop of blood from your body. It doesn’t matter if the other person is your junior or senior, greet them. But if I greet you twice and you don’t answer me, that’s the end oo! I gentle no mean say I no get sense.
• Be kind but have boundaries– Aesop said, “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” Be good for goodness sake. But beware of those who only want to take and take without knowing and respecting boundaries. Lean on me no mean say make you press me die.
• Period syncing actually exists– I lived with 9 ladies and I noticed that our periods started coming at the same time. If not on the same day, it would start within the same week. Some scientists have carried out researches on this topic and they have come up with interesting findings. You can read more about it here.
• Stay hydrated and mind your business– On a serious note, drink water and mind your business. Generally, minding your business has been saving lives since 1900.
• Not all rules are meant to be broken– There were hostel rules and regulations. I broke a few for my own sanity but there were some rules that we all had to strictly adhere to. For example, the use of electric cookers was prohibited but some people went ahead to use them. This caused a fire outbreak in one of the hostel buildings which led to the loss of certificates and other priced possessions. If you can’t abide to simple rules and regulations what does that say about you as an adult?
• Crowd mentality will most likely lead you astray– Going to night classes was a huge thing back then in my hostel and school in general. The truth is that 70% of those attending these classes were not going there to read or study. Most people went for night classes to create an impression that they were studious and just because others were doing it. Find what works for you and stick to it.
• Everybody is not your friend– I can’t stress this enough. There’s a difference between a friend and an acquaintance. Know that there are some people who you simply wave at from a distance, smile and keep it moving.
• Assumptions and hearsay are not facts– Everything I imagined and heard about hostel life was not entirely true and factual. Everyone’s experience is unique and your personality has a great deal in shaping your experience and opinion about a particular person, place or thing. You can’t properly judge a situation you’ve never been in.

In retrospect, I regret moving off campus as there were better accommodation options in school. It would have taken more effort to get into one of those hostels because they were highly sought after but it would have been better for me in the long run. As an undergraduate, did you stay in the school hostels or were you team off campus? What was your hostel like? If possible, would you choose your place of residence in school again? Can you relate with some of the lessons I learned? It’s always a pleasure hearing from you so please join the discussion in the comment section below.